I'm not sorry I burgled your house

On 24 November 2011, The Daily Mail displayed a letter written by a 16-year-old burglar, written as ‘an exercise in remorse and rehabilitation,’ to those living in a house he had burgled.

The letter (all grammatical and spelling mistakes are as originally written) said:

“Dear Victim. I don’t no why I am writing a letter to you! I have been forced to write this letter by ISSP. To be honest I’M NOT BOTHERED OR SORRY ABOUT THE FACT THAT I BURGLED YOUR HOUSE. BASICLY IT WAS YOUR OWN FAULT ANYWAYS. I’m going to run you through the dumb mistakes you made. Firstly you didn’t draw your curtains which most people now to do before they go to sleep.

Secondly YOUR DUMB YOU LIVE IN STAINBURNS A HIGH RISK BURGLARY AREA AND YOUR THICK ENOUGH TO LEAVE YOUR DOWNSTAIRS KITCHEN WINDOW OPEN. I wouldnt do that in a million years. But anyways I DON’T FEEL SORRY FOR YOU AND IM NOT GOING TO SHOW ANY SYMPATH OR REMORES.”

The Mail added:

“The habitual offender, who has not been identified, was put on an Intensive Supervision and Surveillance Programme as punishment for his latest crime. Described as the ‘most rigorous’ form of non-custodial sentence available for young offenders, WRITING LETTERS TO VICTIMS IS PART OF THE PROGRAMME MEANT TO MAKE THEM CHANGE THEIR WAYS. IN THE CASE OF THIS TEENAGER, IT CLEARLY DIDN’T WORK.”

Hands up which of the following punishments you’d prefer inflicted upon this 16-year-old: ‘an Intensive Supervision and Surveillance Programme’ or the birch?

Which do you think would be more likely to stop him having to write unapologetic letters in the future? Yeah. We all think that. Except for those who profit from the mayhem that creatures like this impose upon our society. You know, the know-so-much-better, see-so-much-further turdulent types at the top of the tree who do not see it as part of their brief to pay any attention at all to what the vast majority want or need.

As the cauldron was being warmed, I’d birch them as well.