Inclusivity

Now, before you answer the following question, I want you to bear in mind that one of Tony Blair’s favourite buzz-words is 'inclusive.'

Include everyone in! Especially if they’re in a 'minority' of some sort.

I also want you to remember that TB is a half-Irish Scot who was brought up and educated in Scotland.

Here's the question:

When our own, dear Scots-Irish leader assembled his first 22-strong Cabinet, taking into account their incidence in the general population, how many more times was the non-homosexual, able-bodied Scotsman represented within it, compared to the non-homosexual, able bodied, wholly Anglo-Saxon Englishman?

a) 3.5 times b) 5.75 times c) 9.25 times d) 15.5 times e) 21.75 times f) 38.25 times

Answer: "f" – 38.25 times!

If you wish to do the maths for yourself, bearing in mind that there are 9 times as many English people in Britain as there are Scots, Blair’s first Cabinet was as follows:

Tony Blair – Scots/Irish; Gordon Brown – Scottish; Robin Cook – Scottish; Lord Irvine – Scottish; George Robertson – Scottish; Alistair Darling – Scottish; David Clark – Scottish; Gavin Strang – Scottish; Donald Dewar – Scottish; Ann Taylor – Scottish; John Prescott – Welsh; Lord Richard – Welsh; Ron Davies – Welsh (bisexual); Clare Short – Irish (second-generation); Margaret Beckett - Irish/English; Jack Straw – English (part Jewish); Peter Mandelson – English (half-Jewish and homosexual); Chris Smith – English (homosexual - brought up from the age of ten in Scotland); David Blunkett – English (visually challenged); Harriet Harman – English (married to second-generation Irishman); Mo Mowlam – English; Frank Dobson – English; Jack Cunningham – English.

If one considers the power concentrated at the top of this particular tree one can see that the Anglo-British English were even more discriminated against, at this time, than the 38.25 figure suggests. We have a Scots-Irishman as Prime Minster, a Scot as Chancellor of the Exchequer, a Scot as Foreign Secretary, a Scot as Lord Chancellor; a Scot as Defence Secretary at the time of the war in Yugoslavia who went on to be the head of NATO; a Welshman as Deputy Prime Minister and, of the four political animals closest to Tony Blair in 1997 other than his wife, who has a deal of Irish Catholic blood in her veins, three of them were Scottish.

Alistair Campbell, Blair's director of strategy and communications was his bouncer, Mr. Fixit and spinmeister-in-chief for most of his time in office.

Anji Hunter, his pal since childhood was the 'details Queen,' 'comfort blanket,' and 'gatekeeper' to her boss from the moment he became Labour leader in 1994 until she left for a job with BP in November 2001.

Ms. Hunter rarely left Tony’s side, accompanying him on official trips, running his office and even choosing his ties for him.

The woman who helped out after Hunter’s departure, Fiona Millar, became Cherie Blair’s closest political advisor and 'minder' after the relationship between Cherie and 'style guru,' Carol Kaplan, cooled. Millar is also Scottish and just happens to be Alistair Campbell’s partner.

Derry Irvine, TB's first Lord Chancellor, was his tutor at university, his employer when he was a youthful barrister and his original political mentor and guide.

The fourth of Our Dear Leader’s closest advisers in 1997, Peter Mandelson, was an Englishman of the gay, communist variety. His grandfather was Old Labour bigwig, Herbert Morrison, and his dad, Tony, was the editor of The Jewish Chronicle.

The only other marginally English presence at Blair’s topmost table, when he assembled his first Cabinet, was that of the Home Secretary, Jack Straw, and he has described himself as 'third-generation Jewish.'

In Tony Blair's 2005 cabinet, the Scotsmen Gordon Brown and Alistair Darling were still there, alongside the original trio of Welshman, John Prescott, the half-Irish Margaret Beckett and Jack Straw.

His Minister for Constitutional Affairs was his unelected former flatmate, Charles Falconer. Falconer was ennobled by TB soon after he became Prime Minister. He, thus, became, by the good offices of his former flatmate, the top lawman in the UK. He is Scottish.

The Defence Secretary was the former communist Scot, John Reid. The Chief Secretary to the Treasury was the Scot, Des Browne, and the Minister without Portfolio was the Scot, Ian McCartney. The Development Secretary was the part-Scottish, Hilary Benn.

His Education Secretary at the time, Ruth Kelly, is Irish; the Health Secretary, Patricia Hewitt, is Australian. The Secretary of State for Northern Ireland and Wales and the Leader of the House was the Kenyan-born South African, Peter Hain. The unelected leader of the House of Lords, Valerie Amos, was born in Guyana and, as you might imagine, is black. She, like Charles Falconer, was ennobled by Tony Blair.

The Community Secretary was the second-generation Polish Jew, David Miliband. Miliband was groomed for the top job since before he became an MP by Tony B. He was the top boy in TB's policy unit when he was barely out of university.

Tony Blair found Miliband's brother, Ed, a safe seat in May 2005, and he, too, became a New Labour MP.

Of the six candidates for the leadership of the Labour Party after Gordon Brown's 2010 resignation, the powers-that-be saw to it that these somewhat atypical representatives of the common, British man were the only ones in with a chance of winning.

The twerpish, lisping and over-privileged Ed (who has never had a job in the real world) is now the foremost spokesman for the horny-handed toiler in this country.

The Milibands' dad, Ralph, was an ultra left-wing Polish immigrant who spent most of his life lecturing the student dim on the magnificence of Marxism. Mao-Tse Tung and Joseph Stalin, the two greatest mass murderers in all human history by a considerable margin, were both Marxists.

Marx, of course, was Jewish himself.

Just three members of Tony B's 2005 cabinet were Anglo-British Englishmen.

One of the first things Tony Blair did when he became PM was to enable the Scots to govern themselves by creating a Scottish Parliament.

Thus, we can see that, not only did he want the Scots to run the affairs of the English, he wants the English to have as little influence over the affairs of the Scots as possible.

On his election to the post of Speaker in 2000, Labour placeman, Michael Martin, became the first Roman Catholic to serve in the role since the Reformation. He resigned from the position in June 2009 as a result of the expenses scandal, which did his best to keep under wraps.

Martin, who ranks, intellectually at least, as perhaps the least distinguished Speaker in British parliamentary history, is Scottish also.

Anyway, when you hear the Dear former Scots-Irish Leader use the word 'inclusive' in the future, don’t imagine that he is the least bit interested in including the majority of the heterosexual fellows living in England in his inclusive calculations.